1. | Category: Music jokes  |
| "Havent I seen your face before?" a judge demanded, looking down at the defendant."You have, Your Honor," the man answer... more
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2. | Category: Music jokes  |
| 1st man: "My neighbors were screaming and yelling at three oclock this morning!"2nd man: "Did they wake you?"1st man: "N... more
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3. | Category: Music jokes  |
| A down and out musician was playing his harmonica in the middle of a busy shopping mall. Striding over, a policeman aske... more
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4. | Category: Music jokes  |
| A musician calls the orchestra office, asks for the conductor, and is told that he is dead.The musician calls back 25 ti... more
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5. | Category: Music jokes  |
| A saxophone is like a lawsuit.Everyone is happy when the case is closed.... more
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6. | Category: Music jokes  |
| A tourist is sightseeing in a European city. She comes upon the tomb of Beethoven, and begins reading the commerative pl... more
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7. | Category: Music jokes  |
| A violist and a cellist were standing on a sinking ship together."Help!" cried the cellist, "I cant swim!""Dont worry,"... more
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8. | Category: Music jokes  |
| A violist comes home late at night to discover fire trucks, police cars, and a smoking crater where his house used to be... more
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9. | Category: Music jokes  |
| An eight-year-old kid says t his dad, "When I grow up, I want to be a musician."The dad says, "I am sorry -- cant have i... more
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10. | Category: Music jokes  |
| Conductor: Again from measure 5, if you please.Voice from viola section: But Maestro, we have no measure numbers.... more
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11. | Category: Music jokes  |
| Did you hear about the classical pianist who was not a good speller? When she went out to buy something she left a sign... more
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12. | Category: Music jokes  |
| Do you think, Professor, that my wife should take up the piano as a career? No, I think she should put down the lid as a... more
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13. | Category: Music jokes  |
| Fritz Kriesler and Rachmaninov had a recital in Carnegie Hall once. In the middle of the music, Kriesler got lost and tu... more
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14. | Category: Music jokes  |
| Hey buddy. How late does the band play?About half a beat behind the drummer.... more
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15. | Category: Music jokes  |
| How do you make a bandstand?Take away their chairs... more
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16. | Category: Music jokes  |
| Jacques Thibault, the violinist, was once handed an autograph book by a fan while in the greenroom after a concert."Ther... more
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17. | Category: Music jokes  |
| Knock KnockWhos there !Bach !Bach who ?Bach to work!... more
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18. | Category: Music jokes  |
| Knock KnockWhos there !Bass !Bass who ?Bass the salt and pepper please !... more
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19. | Category: Music jokes  |
| Knock KnockWhos there !Bassoon !Bassoon who ?Bassoon things will be better !... more
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20. | Category: Music jokes  |
| Knock KnockWhos there !Beethoven !Beethoven who ?Beethoven is too hot !... more
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21. | Category: Music jokes  |
| One day the bass player hid one of the drummers sticks.The drummer said, "finally! After being a drummer for so long, no... more
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22. | Category: Music jokes  |
| Person 1: It must be terrible for an opera singer to realize that he can never sing again.Person 2: Yes, but its much mo... more
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23. | Category: Music jokes  |
| Q. How can you tell a bagpiper with perfect pitch? A. He can throw a set into the middle of a pond and not hit any of th... more
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24. | Category: Music jokes  |
| Q. How is playing a bagpipe like throwing a javelin blindfolded? A. You dont have to be very good to get peoples attenti... more
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25. | Category: Music jokes  |
| Q. If you were lost in the woods, who would you trust for directions, an in-tune bagpipe player, an out of tune bagpipe... more
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26. | Category: Music jokes  |
| Q. What did the bagpiper get on his I.Q. test? A. Drool.... more
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27. | Category: Music jokes  |
| Q. Whats the definition of a quarter tone? A. A bagpiper tuning his drones.... more
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28. | Category: Music jokes  |
| Q. Whats the difference between a dead bagpiper in the road and a dead country singer in the road? A. The country singer... more
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29. | Category: Music jokes  |
| Q. Whats the difference between a lawnmower and a bagpipe? A. You can tune the lawnmower, and the owners neighbors are u... more
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30. | Category: Music jokes  |
| Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. To get away from the bagpipe recital.... more
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